Over due one month ago...

Now I'm sitting down on my bed, using my brother's laptop to blog about this stupid relationship...
My relationship was so screwed up, that I decided to seal myself off with the world for a month maybe more...
I'm still not sure how long will it take but I guess, it's gonna take quite sometime, a really long period...

I'm utterly sad about this breakup but I guess there's nothing left for me to fight for it...

Part of the breakfall in my relationship was a simple test that I had plotted to test you.
Eventually, the result was kinda of expected but yet I was still hoping that there will be a change in the result.

I initiated a break up with you and wanted to see you reaction.
The result was, well in fact, dissappointing,
first you wanted the relationship back but gradually, you just let it go without a fight...
How I wished you could bug me a little longer...

The Ugly truth,
A simple test,
Not much resistance,
Pufffff...
It was all long gone...

I felt that I was not worth for you to fight for me...
Not a single bit to you...
You may cry and said you love me, but I guess it's compaionship that you were looking for...
Comfort, protection...
I felt pathetic, utterly sad and I simply have no rooms to express myself with...
No one was there and I was like a living dead...
It's seem unfair, really unfair...

How I fought for you and how you fought for me,
It really hit hard on me everytime I think about it...

Many will find this it's stupid to test...
But you ain't in my shoes...
I give what you need.

My instinct was already predicting that there was someone else in the picture...
Well, It's slapped me hard yet again...

Before betrayal steps in,
I stepped out it...

My mind keep repeating this same verse again and again...
When you go, would you even turn to say
"I still love you"?

But the answer you gave was,
"I don't love you like I did yesterday"

Dont feel pressurized,
cause I know how you actually feel,
if things can't worked out,
It's my fault to test your faith...
I guess I don't really worth your time and effort.
You were strong...
And I'm sorry...

Goodbye Yeobo...
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
My aching heart...
While my heart keep cutting itself,
Memories were like nightmare each night...
They hunt me to sleep...
As my tears will keep on running,
The pain have never stopped...
Till the daylight shined,
I cried asleep...

It's definitely hard to swallow my own tears ...
But it's been worthwhile and yet again I was presented wortheless, unvalued.

Dear God, it's painful me now,
I wished you could send someone over to help me out now...
Guess I have to do it alone..

It's over... 9.27pm
Dead...